The Kitten Know As Leeks.

That's what they're calling me now. Leeks. How embarrassing is that? It sounds as though I am constantly leaking some sort of fluid, or that I cause the leaking of some sort of fluid. Of course, I do like the chew on things, but those things consist mostly of the female's hand and my own food, so I'm fairly certain that nothing is really leaking there.

In other news, I have figured out how to break into my food container. Seeing how the food is simply in a bag though I shouldn't consider this much of a feat. Although... I have been opening it from the seal rather than just chewing through the bag like the mangy mutts do... Anyways, this has caused the female great distress today. I am thoroughly pleased. She did not catch on right away, so I continued for about half an hour. She would come and close the bag, I would promptly open it and gorge myself, she would then scold me and tell me that I would get "fat", seal the bag again, then the process would repeat itself. She eventually figured out that she needed to move the bag out of my reach. I am determined this evening to access the bag. If this fails, I will keep her awake all night since I am positive she works in the morning.

She also keeps mentioning a "photo shoot" that she wants to do with me and the fish. Does she not realize what a bad idea this is for her? She will most certainly lose one of her precious fish during this process, and it will make a tasty snack for myself. Perhaps I should encourage this "shoot"...

I am almost positive that I mentioned the "gate" before. It's a small barricade that allows me to go into the human's bedroom but keeps the dumb dogs out. I found out today that there is a door in it! What am I to do if the humans leave the door open? Those stupid dogs will be able to come and go and I will have no place to go to avoid them! I swear, my dear readers, sometimes it is rather difficult living with all of these fools.

The female seems to be in an aggravated state this evening, so I must bid you ado before she catches me on her machine, as I'm sure that would just aggravate her further. Good night all,
-TKKAL